Before I gave my singleness to God, it seemed that every three to six months I found myself interested in someone. I’d date him for three months, but most times it didn’t go any further. By my late twenties, the pattern became a great frustration to me. I knew being celibate would be a turn off to most men, but I never thought it would hinder me from getting married. Yet, like clockwork by month three he was gone taking my heart with him.By the time I was 28, I was in a real funk. Men no longer asked me out. They weren’t striking up conversations with me in the grocery aisle. I felt like God was hiding me away, letting my best years pass me by. I just wanted to be loved like everybody else. This was the worst year of my loneliness. I began to feel that I couldn’t do any better. And it was also the year that God was able to get my attention.
You see, God will not play second best to your desires. I could have whined all I wanted for the next ten years about why I wasn’t married, but the fact remains;
"I was playing games with God by keeping him from having an active role in my dating life. I made choices on whom to date without consulting Him."
I said my Hallelujah’s at church, yet when it came to giving my heart to someone I was the master of my life. It’s tough to admit, but it was pride that was keeping me from the life of my dreams.
Once I made up my mind to stick closer to God, my outlook on life slowly began to change. Even though I often cried myself to sleep from the loneliness, I began to feel the Lord’s arms comforting me. In His Word I discovered the depth of His unconditional love and what kind of man I should accept into my life. If marriage was my heart’s desire, I had to take the cue from heavenly Father and do away with childish things. It didn’t matter how great the guy was, whether my family liked him, or how much I once loved him. If he wasn’t the kind of man who put God’s desires above his own or someone who wasn’t sincerely dating me with the purpose of marriage, I had to let him go.
I know this sounds old fashioned. But I tell you, letting God into that part of my life protected me from hurt, gave me the confidence to believe that God was preparing me for the man that was best for me and allowed my heart to be available when my husband eventually showed up. If you find yourself "on the fence" of decision, run to the One who knows you best of all. Surrender your singleness by letting Jesus into every part of your life.
Let these men go if:
If he is not the kind of man who put God’s desires above his own
If he is someone who is not sincerely dating you with the purpose of marriage
If he loves anything more than God including his mother, his Madden football, his car, or his boys
If he doesn't have a plan for his life or isn't actively pursuing that plan
If he'd rather spend his money on himself rather than you
If he doesn't have have a good work ethic
If he doesn't work
